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AFTER SIX YEARS OF COURTSHIP, I WANTED TO GET MARRIED BUT HE DOESN’T – LADY SEEKS ADVICE

AFTER SIX YEARS OF COURTSHIP, I WANTED TO GET MARRIED BUT HE DOESN’T - LADY SEEKS ADVICE

AFTER SIX YEARS OF COURTSHIP, I WANTED TO GET MARRIED BUT HE DOESN’T – LADY SEEKS ADVICE

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I have been with my boyfriend for six years. We are not married, don’t have children and we live together. I am 29, he is 34. I think we have a good relationship and enjoy spending time together. I would like to get married (or at least engaged), but he says he doesn’t. We have had some bad arguments in the past, usually after drinking too much, but it’s settled down a lot in the past 18 months.

We live in his house and the mortgage is in his name despite living together for five years he seems reluctant to put me on the mortgage. I am not looking to own half of his house and I would want to do it properly with a mortgage adviser, which to me seems like a reasonable commitment that he is not willing to make. We did start looking to move house and then get a joint mortgage, but he changed his mind and wants to wait.

I am worried that I am wasting my time with him. We do love each other and I want this to work, but I don’t feel like this is the best it could be. I don’t want to split up and to have wasted six years of my 20s with him, but I don’t want to stay with someone who doesn’t want to marry me or get a mortgage together. Everyone says we make such a good couple and that I shouldn’t split up with him, but I just keep getting these doubts about it working in the long term.

I feel like I have made out that he is some noncommittal m@nster and he isn’t real, I just don’t know what it is. I don’t feel miserable in the relationship and I look forward to seeing him at the end of the day and spending time with him at weekends. I just don’t know what to do.

 

A lady from Zambia seeks your advice.

 

 

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